Mind Conflicts

I keep running after the elusive perfect day without any conflicts. But never can have. There are different conflicts which trouble. There is a common pattern in all humans, the underlying theme is of desire vs morality. One major one which I have observed is as follows.

Oh yes you love the woman and want to make love with her right now, gently and truly but then the thoughts of monogamy or your spouse or she has a boyfriend, am I being led by selfish senses and not anything else... Enemy mind says "Control" the other mind says "Let go and love"... and life goes on.. there are more conflicts this is one.

work wok work

My life has been revolving too much around work. almost each day i have been spending 12 horus and even on weekend catching up with my work. Life is really shit i feel sometimes. At other times i feel arrogant about working so hard and look with a high nose and consider all others some lowly creatures... life is really confusing to live. The same aspect makes me feel shit and arrogant...

Life Myths - 1

Myth:

Visualize, Slog, Slog, Visualize, Slog and life will be as you desire... A happy ending.



A concept you would have seen in many movies one i remember is "In Pursuit of Happyness". Its a big myth media, movies, novels glorify this. the motivational speakers, spiritualists, trianers make money out of it.



I am not a pessimist or hopeless but i am a realist. I beleive that there are geniuses and mentaly challenged.. 2 extremes and all the billions of people on this earth are interspersed between this 2 extremes. Only a few are on the extreme and not everyone can become or is a genius. One genius who is born in penury and he may achieve what Will Smith did in the movie but that is once and only one in a lifetime.



This whole concept is so flawed but so interesting (come to think of it someone is promising you the world if you slog) that most people fall for it and only later they realize that it is not happening as they had seen, visualized and they get hopeless. hopeless to an extent that it becomes difficult to get them out of this and help find happiness.



True happiness comes from accepting yourself as you are and being able move ahead step by step from there. But at the same time also remember that at times destiny has a differnt story for you and you may end up being pushed backwards.. The happiness comes from the journey and having some love around you. Your acceptance of your self and having people around you who repsect who you are and help in taking you ahead in the journey of life.



Even our education system is made of making everyone a genius/ expert, however they have a new concept of multiple intelligence and one should find his/ her attribute of intelligence where one is genius. It is flawed it must just focus on finding what you are better at and can make a good living and you can grow.



True happiness lies in finding yourself and knowing yourself and planning life accordingly. Not biting more than you can chew that you choke yourself or not dreaming what will only frustrate you and make you feel smaller. Just know and move ahead.. you may become a genious in this way but may not also. Just get along and enjoy the journey...

Restrain the fun...2

The last time I wrote I got carried away with too many thoughts in the mind. This is an attempt to give the logic again in simple manner why we must restrain the fun even though you are going to die anyway.

If we go back in history our very old anscestors who had not even discovered fire, for them earth was as much as they could walk. it was a flat surface for them. Pleasure had a different meaning. We evolved, fire was discovered, life meaning changed.. the basic understanding of what life is all about changed. We evolved further more intelligent scientists came across machines were made, moon was discovered, so many things have changed or evolved with time and each time the meaning of life is redefined by the best of scientists. Every time we do and debunk the earlier ones (which a while back was the only truth known).

In this flux we have realized that science and logical thinking has not been able to answer all about life. There are so many miracles which happen around us. Science has not been able to explain. Miracles associated with spritiual practices like meditation, reiki, EFT, astrology, past life experiences of people. None can be answered through moder science or logic.

The only intelligent deduction of all this therefore is to accept we do not know everything, logic even if the most intelligent one fails to answer much about life. It changes each time with each new discovery.

if logic has its weaknesses and there is a proof of life beyond our comprehension how do we lead the life? we should lead to discover the unknown as some miracles tell us that there is a life larger than what we understand. much larger !! we should experiement and enlarge our experience... if that is to be done we will have to work and restrain the fun. restrain to move up to a higher plane.

Thats one strong reason to restrain the fun.

Another one is look at life of people who have had unrestrained fun. You will see it comes with a equal lot of pain as you become dependent on having it always.. but body, mind, money gets depleted with unrestrained fun. drive a car without breaks and it will meet with an accident.. it may damage you, the car.. it will be painful you may be hurt, it will require much hard work from now as you will not have any car any longer. It comes with equal or greater pain, in that case the overall fun mathematically speaking fun - pain is always "zero" or negative.

This is another strong reason to restrain !!

Life has extreme beauty !! Beauty is all over, all around you. Discover, experience with compassion and love and you will be surprised restraining the fun (fun defined as per sensual pleasure) will lead to a lot of happiness and peace...

restrain the fun...

Last i wrote some time back.

Continuing from my last post why restraint the fun (fun here means immediate gratification of sesnes) we are going to die anyway.. logically it sounds great but somewhere instinct makes me restrain. if you look at the other side of the logic which is more deductive from some assumptions than pure calculative as i had shown... restrain makes sense.

Assumption is look at human beings what a perfect machine.. there is much more to life than what i see. i have no answer to why we are as we are, why we arent a generation of cockroaches eating dirt.. why so much senses and what are these pleasures.. how did these get created and how did we get created. sometime i do wonder what the hell this life is. its so unbelievable to think out of this massive open unending hole the sky.. the universe how the hell did we get created.. and to top it we are not just some beings a perfect machine with so much complications.. speech, senses, goals, mind, perception, madness, genius, love, anger, hatred.. all is so complicated.. wonder what created this. you realize there is much more to life then what you perceive and that can be a starting point to discover.

and when you try some occult practices you are amazed more. i have tried and i can swear by it, years back i tried reiki and i was surprised by miracles which it can make happen. A miracle is something which goes beyond logic.. i remmeber by doing a 7 day half hr to 1 hr healing while a young undergraduate on an addict i could cure him of his addiction... addiction of substance which modern science struggles to and by their logic it takes months, years.

such miraicles are there all over.. i graduated to some meditation and am amazed by the peace which it gives it is tough but it does give power.. you tend to therefore believe there is much larger life than what you can see.

and that has to be discoverd, made use of in this life. after all the fun which i talked about is actually no fun it is a like a video game. it is a make believe world... you make yourself believe in a beauty which is not there. you make your mind weak and attached and feel good on getting what you desire.. unending desires. a unending big loop which goes nowhere.

difficult to explain what i wish to say... most of the pleasure are created of our own feeling of being incomplete. someone desires to be no 1 business man someone else desires to be a carefree creative person both believe they are most superior and get pleasures from different pursuits of theirs. They despise the others life which ironically gives him/ her the fun which we does not wish to restraint.. both are humans.. at times it feels these are created realities. created by the mind.. why one loves a woman and the other just hates that same woman. created reality. for the one who loves having the woman is the ultimate joy and for the other destroying her from his life is the ultimate joy.. no answers to each his own and it is all created.

when you clear your mind, you realize that it is far more difficult to have such attachments. what we think we should have or we feel we do not have is from the perspective of being wanting to be loved, known by the larger society. that becomes our life. dictated by terms of society you wish to make impression of. the brand you wish to create of yourself. drop the brand be nobody and you will be powerful. if we feel full we will be far more free from this empty feeling.

all i am trying to say there is more to life than the immediate fun which is like a kindergartern video game. restrain the fun to discover that life which comes with being a human being. this whole perfect universe has not come by itself and there is more and i hope for a life after life and hence beleive this is time to learn and grow. and drop my created reality of fun. I believe.

from my own experience I can say the restraining gives you power which is unimaginable and it is far more fun than mere satidfying your pleasures.

The biggest irony of unrestrained fun is that after a time it is no longer fun and you desire for more and more and that more is always elusive and you suffer and you suffer far more than you had fun. there is an inverse mathematical equation of suffering is always active and in a nutshell all the fun you have gets equalized and net net the equation reads "zero" fun... no fun after all.

I believe. Believe in future of being larger than human being and thats why i restrain playing the video game, of having that unrestrained fun which is actually not fun...

heady

My take on life from perspective of death

It is written in 1st person to make it more personal and more impactful does not mean that all I write here is my own experience.

Why restrain the fun…. I will die anyways one day

I often see people say and that we have only one life and let’s make most out of it. Let’s enjoy to its fullest.

I wonder if it is only one life and with death it will end why we put breaks to the enjoyment and pleasure. Don’t eat that dessert (ah the one which gives you pleasure which nothing else does. It looks, smells, and tastes like heaven). You will put on weight. Get up you lazy you are wasting your time. You tell yourself early afternoon while lying on the bed. Get up and do some work. The pleasures of senses which you just can’t have it unlimited because of values which say - be moderate, learn to be content, plethora of rules of what is right or wrong when it comes to senses. If it is only one life why not have it all? What’s the harm in having all the pleasures before we die?

At the end of day I will die living with all this restraint behavior I may have only 10 -60 minutes of good time each day. Considering on the weekdays it will be not more than 20 minutes (all the stress of work and on weekends it will go up to 2 hours. The average for a week will be 48 minutes. If I will live for 70 years and keep having fun this way I will have 20700 hours of fun. That may sound big but if I have unlimited fun 12 hours a day (assume rest time I sleep and do my necessary chores) I can clock these hours in just 4.7 years I don’t need 70 goddamn years. And the depth of experience needless to say will be higher in 4.7 years. I can have unrestricted fun with drugs, booze and sex. That’s what hippie culture was based on. I love them and their lifestyle.

Why all debates on euthanasia, life when is suffering it will be good to end it. Why all debate on suicide we die any ways one day when don’t want to slog one’s ass to come out of a depression as slogging is pretty boring and tiresome could just have an overdose of a drug which will give you an ecstatic experience, the ultimate nirvana and then could just move on. Why debate on drugs? it gives you a nirvanic experience. Just out of the world pleasure which you can otherwise never have. Why the restrain when death will follow. I should perhaps just maximize my pleasures.

Any answers?

Why do I write blogs?

When I started writing a blog I just had an excitement to be there and explore some topics which otherwise are difficult to write about. Here you have the hope and excitement that a larger world will read it and some may like it. Also these are themes which one does not talk about on a coffee table; these also require some peace of mind to organize thoughts.

People write blogs for various reasons and there are pop psychologists who have theories around why people write blogs. I have not seen any convincing theory most of them are bogus theories. One common fact is these are thoughts/ opinions which we want people to read, it could be though only your social circle. If there were no blogs imagine the long blogs I write I would have to narrate to all my friends/ family one by one. By end of it I would have been declared insane. I think that’s one common thread for all the bloggers (communicating my thoughts to larger world) but there are more reasons and is very individual centric.

For me another reason is to explore organize thoughts around some aspects of life. Little philosophy oriented. I am not the one who can read a lot but I like to learn through my own reasoning and writing helps me do so.

Blogs add the charm of letting people know and comment on my thoughts. And perhaps there is a hope of getting appreciation from the world, from your social circle of how well I think or write. Well the reality may be otherwise (I may be a boring blogger) but well I have defense mechanism up and quite hopeful to impress quite a few :)

Some conversation drifted me to the subject of death. It triggered my thoughts - one day I will die and so will all of you reading this :) (Death and smiley I don’t know go well together). I am not trying to scare anyone but jut plan to write on a series of human topics keeping in mind that we do die one day and in that context want to explore if the baggage we create in this life is really worth it? It’s a topic I want to explore may be extreme but extremes help us learn better they challenge the thought process.