Happiness

This has become a cliché now that happiness does not come through material or senses. They are pleasurable but happiness is something different, it is a state of mind.

Happiness comes when you are in control. In control of your surroundings and are able to manoeuvre your way as you desire.

• You become happy when you are in control of your work and you mesmerise your customers, peers, boss with the output. you are in control
• You become happy when your lover does as you would have wanted it, you are in control.
• You become happy when you are in control of your time. All done well as planned within time. You control your time
• You become happy when you are at your best in your social circle or with customers. You are appreciated for what you are. You are in control

Control gives happiness. Spirituality and Philosophy believe you cannot control the surroundings, you can never be that perfect and moreover the surroundings also want the same control. There will always be a conflict. As per them best is you control your mind and try to want as less external control as possible. Get it to a point of zero so that you are eternally happy. It definitely has a logic less you want from outside more you are in control of what you want as all lies within you and is independent of the surroundings. The more control you have on your mind the more happy you get. 

Life & Thoughts - 2

Life brings in many contradictions and answers are always difficult. The good thing is all such contradictions serve a definite time, they have their death and it solves by itself. One such contradiction is success and failure. 

We all want for ourselves, our loved ones, friends, family - success. But there are times it just does not come, life has its own ways of dealing with it. Life does not look at effort alone and there is luck, which a lot of times play a spoil sport. Unfortunately with failure comes whole lot of emotions - you feel as if you are being cheated, life is unfair to you, selfish conniving people robbed you of what you deserve, you start feeling under confident, you doubt yourself. The moment just takes over you with a force that it makes you go through a whirlpool. Not a happy one, too many thoughts, emotions.. utter confusion, anger, depression. 

All of this has a ripple impact. All your loved ones feel anxious, worried and they wonder what can we do to make you feel better. Many feel the same way you feel - Why is life so unfair? Why are people so selfish and conniving? Why do they hurt? They fear that you may lose yourself and want to protect you. 

But they cant protect you. The mind does not listen to anyone but to its own self. If it does not have the right coping mechanism it can go down; down to a point of no return. It is scary. 

The mind needs coping mechanism. The coping mechanism is nothing but a repository of good successful experiences, of happy thoughts, its about belief in oneself, it is about knowing your strengths and playing on it.  This is the repository you can go back to and remind yourself this too shall pass. There are ups and then there are downs. But there are ups. That builds hope and gives you courage to stand again and fight. 

The coping mechanism develops much faster  with sensitive encouragement from people who want to protect you - your loved ones, colleagues and family. This is perhaps the most important purpose of any relationship. If the relationship does not provide you this encouragement and is not sensitive to you, your strengths it is meaningless. Get away from it.