Yet again on Purpose...

This seems to be my favourite topic.. comes from a deep desire to do more out of life, and perhaps also has to do with the way my life is going on currently.. at work front I have accomplished quite a bit but my heart keeps telling me life is much beyond it.. And because I am working hard I am unable to get time to give time to other activities which I think could help me extract more from life. ..I want more and hence it bothers me -  what can I do more to have even more out of life... It also has to do with the fact that I have no other distraction in life it is either work or me.. there are no addictions, kids, partners who fill up the time and leave no room for such questions.. I am back yet again on what more? What more, the question makes me feel greedy, however I am not perturbed.. I am greedy for life, happiness, fulfilment. 

Though I have tried to answer this question couple of  times earlier, those attempts I tried to make a roadmap on how one can have a purpose.. feel inadequate, put sustained effort and commit... it will come.. it has been more to do away with inertia.. but currently I am stuck up with a tangential thought and that is  - is there a purpose? Is it not an illusion? Is it not just a defence mechanism to give yourself to hard work without thinking of what I will achieve? It is perhaps a way of coming to this answer through elimination.. so here I go

The thought rests in the fact that after all life ends in ashes, and none remembers. It ends and even if it may have been etched in some history books.. you are no longer living it.. someone is just reading it to get kicks for her life.. The first point is life ends so where will any purpose take you, anyway.. so why bother so much of accomplishing and trying to create a monument of your life which may some day be called the 9th wonder of world? Is it worth it? My point is that purpose is not leaving your name in history books for next generation.. It is not about creating any edifice, of becoming the richest, the smartest.. it ends all ends... If it is not about achievement then what can be purpose about.. all the purpose people talk and I have till now heard is about where do you want to be...

The new age psychologists who study fulfilment through work these days, say it is about aligning your life with your motivations and value system through a series of positive actions.. These are rooted in your personality which is stable over time, align it and you feel good.. for example you may value altruism so you find ways to align your actions around that.. or you may value money so you align yourself towards work which gives you the same.. Alas this also does not answer, as we a re so multidimensional and motivations are like a shifting goal post, you have money and you will need power, you have power and you may need fame, you have that and you may need something else.. It is a circle and desires in general don't fulfil anything..fulfilling desires is impossible and my point is it is also not a purpose.. so what is left to have a purpose?

If you are reading this at this point, you may want to raise your hand and say purpose is about helping others in need.. The question is  - Is it a purpose or a worthy action? Help people in need cannot be a purpose but a responsibility, a higher action in the hierarchy of actions categorized under humanity... A way to pay it back for all you have got from others, a way to acknowledge that all of us are social animals and need love, help, support and it does not come unless we extend it ourselves. A way to a peaceful life, a way to fulfil a deep desire which we all have of seeking love and companionship, and it is only possible if we also give.. it is not a one way traffic.. overall energy on the planet remains same, it can be rooted in goodness or evil.. the more goodness the more happiness.. These actions are not purpose but the right way to act, even in this there are so many variants, causes to work for - education, people with special needs, poverty, sick, environment, corruption, etc. These actions are important to do our bit to save humanity for a future generation, make future life better and not a purpose...

If purpose is not achievement, fulfilling needs, doing good - Can there be a purpose? is purpose a myth an intellectual debate of mind to keep us distracted from what we must do, a strategy of mind to make us lethargic, keep us away from hard work in the work we have taken, in fulfilling responsibility? a way of mind to procrastinate, not accept our imperfections by believing we are not being perfect as it is not what we really are meant to do.. I don't know 

By writing again and again on this, I am convinced, there is no higher purpose to be looked for. Purpose for me is to be honest with life, taking the daily life steps with all I have got, to handle the questions of life rooted in here and now. Future is unpredictable I just need to find a balance between my responsibility towards my self, others who are my responsibility - kids, partner, parents, friends and towards my desires which make me feel good.. All bounded within a value system which constitute good karma, which means I don't act in fear, greed, weakness, don't harm someone for my gain..... 

It is about a balance between responsibility, love n care and my desires. A balance much hard to achieve as life has much subjectivity, each moment testing us to take decision which can either bring this balance or disrupt it....Right effort for the same is the purpose, that's all ! Discovering yourself is the purpose, that's all! Trying to move ahead is the purpose, that's all......

Purpose...

"We have lived our lives by the assumption that what was good for us would be good for the world. We have been wrong. We must change our lives so that it will be possible to live by the contrary assumption, that what is good for the world will be good for us. And that requires that we make the effort to know the world and learn what is good for it.-- Wendell Berry